HELP!! :( Deceased Father

[DaddysDreamer]

Hey, my name is Allie Davis. I'm 17 and i just lost my dad in November [2008]. Him and i were VERY close. My mom, little brother, and I had moved to Washington in jan 07 while he stayed in Kansas to repair our old house and get it onto the market.. He was a leukemia survivor, he had gone thru multiple unsuccessful rounds of chemo therapy during my childhood and then in 2003 finally had a bone marrow transplant and was expected to be alright. Well, on Monday, November 10th, 2008 i was at school. I had a strange feeling but i was in a pretty good mood. I was sitting in english talking to my best friend and she was like what the hell? And told me to look at a text she had received. It was a status update (like what are you doing?) on facebook of my older brothers. It said "Nick says rest in peace dad i already miss you, i love you man". I said it was probably a joke in the frat house or one of the frat dads passed, but i was sure that my dad was fine. He had called and talked to my little brother the night before (he was a large phone talker b/c he was alone in our old house) and i had been happy not to talk to him b/c i didnt want to be stuck on the phone with him. I made a comment similar. And so i was sure he was alright.. i knew he was. Well, a few minutes passed and it sunk in that i needed to call home. And i did.. My grandma answered (we live with her) and i could tell by her voice something was REALLY wrong, but i choked out the words to ask for my mom.. then i dropped the phone when my mom answered, my best friend had gone with me and so she picked up the phone and got the news then held the phone to my ear (i was hysterically crying and shaking) my mom told me.. i said "pick. up. now... im crashing" and she came and got me..

We flew home the next morning and stayed in a hotel in kansas. I had a dream the next night after his death. He called my phone and started screaming at me about getting the guns out of the house so my uncle couldnt take them (my uncle was a mooch) and then he was like oh.. and its okay if your a lesbian (i had been debating coming out to my mom about being bi, but my dad woulda just figured i was a lesbian, it was all the ssame to him) and he yelled at me for a few other things and then it was over. It was SO realistic though... because he was a screamer and had quiet a temper.

Well, at about 2 1/2-3 months i had dreams he was chasing me yelling, but it scared me soo i went as fast as i could away from him.. fast fast fast and then i'd wake up before he caught me.

At about 4 months he started killing me. Strangling me, beating me, shoving a chainsaw thru my back, very violent things... it was SO scary.. they were hella repetative.

And now its getting to the point where he makes me soo close to death that im laying in a pool of blood and i can see him kill my mom and brother.

They all repeat nightly following the time frames. This new one about him killing my mom and brother is soo freaking scary. I went to the dr for meds and he gave me an anti anxiety drug.. but i need to know what they mean..
they are sscaring me to the poiint of no return. I miss him soo much..


please help? I'd give the world to know what they mean.

[DrmDoc]

Hello DaddysDreamer,

There is something in your relationship with your father that you have allowed to fester and have not confronted; i.e., you're running away from something you should be facing as it relates to your father's influence. Your first dreams shows how well you know your father's thoughts or way of thinking. That first dream may also suggest the real opportunity you had to say goodbye. Such dreams often suggest some real contact with the departed. However, your subsequent dreams suggest you have much to resolve when it comes to the legacy of your father's influence. I hope this helps.

[Zuludawn]

Part of it is guilt that may be related to coming out. The other part may be your relationship with your father didn't end the way you wanted it too (not meaning his death) but you left something unresolved before he passed. I think it's more than the coming out deal because it has escalated to him killing everyone in your dream. Think about what you wanted to tell him but didn't get the chance.