I need some friend advice...she is just so jealous

[Hannah1234]

Hi,

I have this friend, shes quite a big girl but still very pretty in the face. She is basically quite depressed and not happy with her appearance. When we go out she is fine but as soon as you add a male into the situation she goes into a moody, teenage strop and tends to just walk off on her own so that somebody ends up following her (though now we jus ignore it).

We could be talking to a group of girls we don't knwo and she will laugh and joke but as soon as a male comes in and doesnt talk to her or is talking to someone else at the table EVEN if it is for example my or a friends boyfriend...she gets annoyed and leaves.

She then blames us? She doesn't get any blokes but not because of her looks as she thinks but because of the way she acts around men. she pre judges that they will look at her nd think urgh shes fat and so she acts like thats what they think before they have even spoken to her!

If my boyfriend hugs or kisses me infront of her (not kisses full blown, a hello peck on the lips sort of kiss) she will get annoyed and walk off. If anybody out of her friends has a boyfriend and this happens or even they are just talking to the bloke theyre with she will get annoyed. And she will tell someone else say oh they're all over each other, they jus ignored me and started talking to themselves and she is convinced that everyones boyfriends hate her when they have doen nothing to suggest that. In fact they are all very nice to her and keep her involved because she does not involve herself.

Im just so sick of it. She is such a lovely person and when my boyfriend and i went on a break i was devastated and she was there for me but i have recently found out that she was one of the poeple telling my boyfriend some of the lies that broke us up in the first place. its just so tiring being friends with someone who doesn't seem to want you to be happy. I can't force her to be something she is not, she wants to lose weight but she doesnt try. I have asked her to come with me to the gym, once i managed to get her there but she wouldn't do anything bcoz she thought ppl would laugh at her for being overweight and when i said ppl come to the gym to lose weight we're all here for the same reason, she didnt take notice. I see her twice as much as i see my boyfriend but if i see her every night a part from one she says i see him too much and dont see her enough?

She has now become close mates with a gd friend of my boyfriends and mine and she has started bitching to her about how my bf and i shouldn't be together, that we see each toher to mcuh? I see him twice a week at most at the moment coz he works long hours!

What can i do?? i really need some help its exhuasting. i cant keep everyone happy.

[resin8love]

You can pray for your freind and be a freind. Encourage her , its easer to keep people down than to pull them up. Thats where you need to pray, pray for dirctions how to help and that GOD will bless her in her life. You obviously care for your freind or you would not have posted this. I pray for you both too. GOD bless you, peace.

[Jennings]

Your friend has emotional problems that probably originated in her infancy and the behaviour she is displaying is that of 'attention seeking'. She probably has a poor self-image, again stemming from her childhood and she may be hiding a secret. Feeling ugly about herself she is now endeavouring to make herself ugly to men, so the indication is that she has probably had a bad experience with men as a child. She needs a listening ear and she needs friends but for the present it appears that she does not need any more men in her life. I hope this little explanation helps. If she genuinely wants to trim her figure (which is doubtful) get her on to the Atkin's diet.