dreaming of partner having an affair

[serenityguru]

I am hoping someone can help me with this. For the last week I have been having dreams regarding my partner being unfaithful/deceptive in some way. This includes having affairs with faceless people, known people and people of both sexes (we are both female if that makes a difference). Or of me finding out things that haven't been revealed to me by her. The dreams are vivid, almost scripted, as are the arguments that ensue ( in the dream only. I do recognize that is a dream only and am not angry with her in reality at all) . As far as I know our relationship is stronger than it ever has been and we have been together for years. I trust her completely.

Does anyone have any ideas? I've been having some version of these dreams religiously for the last week or so. They are beginning to become very annoying.

[Jennings]

It does sound as if you are afraid of losing her affection. Could it be possible that she is a tad bisexual. Often when we experience bliss (or near bliss) the opposite feelings creep-in destroying the moment or occasion and it can be difficult to shake-off those fears of insecurity. From this distance your feelings do seem reasonably normal.

[licia25]

Hi ya!
I've been plagued with the same type dreams myself and am in a WONDERFUL relationship. what i have found is that one) arguments in a dream can be a sign of a healthy relationship, they show that you are not afriad to express how you feel and two) adultry in a dream usually has little to do with our partner and ALOT to do with our own insecurities. Just as Jennings said, when our relationship is the most sound, it can bring out insecurites and fears that seem irrational. My own dreams, I found, have to do with my own insecurities of not being good enough or living up to expectations. Though my boyfriend reassures me that I am perfect in his eyes, I still have the dreams. Has there been anything resently that may have dampened your self-esteem? a bad hair-cut? comparing yourself to others? a comment or joke someone made? discussions of your partners ex's? These dreams can be painful and confusing, i sincerley hope you find your answer.
let me know if i can help
best of luck
-licia

[serenityguru]

Thank you Jennings and licia25. You have given me plenty to think about.

FYI It's gotten to the point where I can give my partner the latest installment of the continuing saga each morning. She actually asks me "who did I have an affair with last night?"

[Jennings]

Thank you for the feedback. It is recognised that with infidelity one's affections can so easly be short-circuited but the bottom-line is, so long as they know their way home.

[licia25]

Yes, it has gotten to the point that when i tell my boyfriend I had a bad dream last night he says, "how did i cheat on you this time?" or "what horrible thing did i do this time?" If you want you could look up my other threads ones titled 'boyfriend raping girls' is a good one, i got alot of great responses on it and also, 'women being murdered' was a good one that might actually help you. I'm right there with you on these dreams, they are confusing and hurtful and above all frustrating. Keep me posted
-licia