Rather unsettling dream

[Intothemystic]

Today I had a dream when I feel asleep from 3:30 pm until 11:00 pm.
*I changed the names (and I'm sorry if this borders on being a little long, I happen to be very descriptive of my dreams since I remember them quite vividly most times.)

<dream start>

This dream began with my dysfunctional mother, her native best friend, and myself sitting in my mother's friend's vehicle. Her friend, *Terry, was driving us to the mall in our small hometown in Ontario. The entire drive to this mall, my mother, *Ellen, was continously belittling me for not being able to find a job (despite the economy), not being able to finish high school on time (despite constant dysfunctional family abuse hindering my process), and being a useless sponge on my entire family.

Needless to say, but I was really irritated and upset with her in this particular dream. When we reached the mall, I deceided to ignore her constant string of insults and stay outside in the car while her and *Terry went into the grocery store there. While I was in the car, I noticed that none of the radio stations worked, so I went and stood outside the car waiting for them to return.

When I glanced around, I noticed *Terry coming out of the grocery store looking annoyed. She came over to me and half-laughing, mentioned something about my mother getting in a yelling match with the teenaged cashier over incorrect coupons and pricing. Her and I laugh, knowing how my mother is, and go to get back inside the car, but it's up and dissapeared on us. We look around and spot it behind a square of chainlink fence, locked in.

We are both very confused as we circle this squared in car, asking each other how in the hell we were to get it out of there. *Terry deceides to climb the fence and jump into the area to find a key for the fence gate's lock. While she's climbing the fence, she asks me about this man I know, who happens to be around my age (I'll be 20 in 3 months, he's 23 or 24 now), and how my situation with him is developing. Before I can answer her, I look behind me and to my paniced surprise, somehow, he's at the mall walking out.

I point at him and say, "There Terry, that's him, and-Eep!" He sees me point at him, so I turn away quickly, but it was too late. He comes over and we talk (I don't recall that dream convo except for the question, "why is that lady climbing that fence?" and we laugh). When *Terry gets in and gets the car out, she offers the man I know to stay for a BBQ at my place (which is where we were heading after the mall). He agrees, I die inside, we pull up to the grocery store, pick up my mom, and leave.

At my place, *Terry and my mother drop him and I off and go to the LCBO, leaving us alone. I apologize for the place being a right disaster of a mess, we talk about a lot of random things, kind of flirty, really nervous. My mother and *Terry are back now, and *Terry must run to pick up my younger sisters for the BBQ. For some reason, my mother starts screaming at me in front of him! (let's call him *Ben). She starts insulting me about my weight, joblessness, black-sheep-of-the-family-sponge-status, and pretty much brings me to tears. *Ben gets quiet annoyed with her and tells her to stop, in which she replies by whipping a glass water pitcher at him.

*Ben just says "Yeah, I don't have to deal with this bullsh*t, I'm sorry <my name> but I can't stay here". He reluctantly and sadly leaves, I am in hysterical tears. I quickly grab the stuff that I'll need and I run downstairs. My mother is following me, throwing ashtrays and shoes at me as I go down the stairs, she's screaming that I ruined her life and that I'm an ungrateful b*tch.

For some reason, his car is now there and he almost pulls out of the driveway when I call to him, "Wait *Ben! I'm going with you! please let me in?". He stops and opens the door, I hop in, close the door, and we're gone.

<dream over>

I then woke up to my mother and sisters arguing and this painful slow-burning butterfly feeling in the pit of my stomach that reminded me of a mixture of panic and heartache combined with blind hope and, what everyone refers to as "love" but that word doesn't describe it well enough.

What are your opinions on this dream? Again, sorry if it's long.

Thank you,
S