recurring relationships (I'm married)

[needingsomehelp]

so here's the deal.... I've been married for almost 10 years. very happy in my relationship and never would cheat on my wife. I've been having dreams that are starting to make me think.... over the past year (at least) i have had the recurring dream about being in relationships with different women. this dream happens at least one time a week. on occasion they have been with people that i know.... but last nights was with a complete stranger. by question is, what's going one here??? should i provide more information on the specifics of the dreams or is just the general concept of the dream along with the fact that they are recurring enough for someone to help me out?
thanks for any input.

[Varzandeh]

Hi,
having sex in dream language symbols if with a known woman means you will do her a big favor a help, nothing more nothing else.
Having sex with an unknown woman means you will achieve a wish at work.

Please see the words " Sex" , woman" and " marriage " here in the dream dictionary -advanced using search.

here are all different scenarios about dreaming a sex.



If one dreamt had anal sex with his wife or another woman means he is innovator in religion and will do something that is not good for him and he doesn't follow the prophet's way.
If dreamt had sex with his mother or sister or some immoral relatives means his relations with the family will cut and means a sorrow also he won't see that relative any more.
If dreamt had sex generally means achieving a wish.
If dreamt two woman or two men had sex means one will do the other a big favor.
If dreamt someone had sex with his wife means his family will get rich or will buy houses.
If dreamt had sex with his wife and the woman was over him means he will marry another woman.
If dreamt had sex with a virgin girl means he will marry in the same year.
If dreamt had sex with the governor's wife means he will overcome the enemy.
If dreamt had sex with a wild animal means he will overcome the enemy.
Some interpreters say will have fears by the governor.
If dreamt had sex with a bird will overcome someone who is interpreted as that bird.
If dreamt had sex with a jew or Zoroastrian means his material situation will arrange.
If an old woman or old man whose passion is gone dreamt had passion like when he was young means he/she will like very much to do religious duties and prayers.
If dreamt had sex with a prostitute means he will like the material world and will receive immoral money.
If one dreamt had sex with a camel means he will rescue from a sorrow and a hard situation also will overcome the rival and will be somewhat famous.
If dreamt had sex with a president or a governor means will be near to the governor.
If dreamt had sex with the queen or the governor's wife means he will receive benefits from the governor.
If dreamt had sex with a woman who was in her cycle means his situation will be worse.
If dreamt had sex with a woman who is passed away means his situation will be worse till he marry one of her relatives.
If dreamt had sex with a known woman means he will be far from her relatives.
If dreamt had sex with a known man means will receive a benefit from him.
If dreamt had sex with an unknown man means will his wish by the governor.
If dreamt had sex with a dead man means will pray for the dead or will do a charity for his sake.
If a woman dreamt had sex with another woman means she will do her a favor.
Some interpreters say if had sex with a woman in her cycle means his affairs in material world will be easy.
If dreamt had sex with a passed away woman means a sorrow.
If dreamt had sex with an unknown dead woman means he will succeed in a job that was disappointed.
If dreamt had sex with a known young man that they are in fight means their enmity will turn to love.
If dreamt had sex with an old woman means will receive a benefit and goodness.

[needingsomehelp]

thanks for the response.... but the dreams very rarely include sex. maybe one time every 6 months. most of the time they are just relationships.... and during the dreams i am aware that i am married or aware that there is someone else....

[Varzandeh]

Hi again,

Dreaming about a young woman for men means a happiness and achieving a wish is on the way , this is the same for women about dreaming a man.*******************88888
The happiness will be as much as the woman ( or man ) will be beautiful and thick.
An old woman means the material world. The best is that the woman or man ( for women) was not known and was of a nice figure, that will mean an opening in the life.
An ugly, thin woman means a short of money and famine , a happy woman ( or a man for ladies) with make up means achieving a wish and an ugly dirty old woman means a bad situation and not achieving a wish.
If a woman dreamt had a male organ means she will have a child or will be pregnant.
If a young woman dreamt she was old means her religion and material affairs are good.
If a woman dreamt had a penis and was having sex means she will have an infamy.
If a man dreamt his wife had penis and was having anal sex with him means he will lose his dignity .
If a woman dreamt she was man and put mean's wear on , for honest women means she will receive a goodness but for dishonest women means she will receive an evil and corruption.
If a man dreamt had sex with a prostitute for material people means their money will increase and for pious people means their knowledge will increase.
An stranger woman is better than a known woman.
If a man dreamt someone or a few men had sex with his wife means the woman's family will get rich for example they will buy houses.
If dreamt his wife went for corruption and sex to the stranger people means they will have benefits from that man.
If dreamt someone gave his wife some medicine means they will have a baby girl.
If dreamt someone gave his wife a sword or a lance means they will have a baby boy.
A woman may also mean : 1- a happiness 2- material world 3- occupation 4- plenty of blessing 5- famine and poverty 6- wealth.

[Sowelu]

(((Hiya!)))

If you acknowledge the concept that everything in a dream is a symbol for something about you, the dreamer, then we can look at these dreams as depictions of your energetic state of being. Each time they occur they are revealing something different about your energy of being.

When I say "energy of being" I'm referring to either your emotional energy, your mental energy, your spiritual energy or your physical energy. Each of these general types of energies that motivate us and that we use to make our way through our life will be depicted symbolically in a dream.

Universally... typically, emotional energy is depicted by females in dreams. Mental energy is depicted by males (beliefs, attitudes, thought patterns, etc). Spiritual energies of a dreamer are often depicted by known spiritual characters (Buddha, Christ, etc.) or other more generic yet universal symbols such as fish, light, the colors white, gold or violet... and more. Physical energies of a dreamer are often depicted by houses, cars, bicycles and other familiar symbols too many to list out here.

All of life, really, is about relationships and relating. Not just relationships with other people but relationships with life itself as well as relationships with external structures and concepts. But all of these relationships are founded upon or flow from our relationship(s) with our own Self, residing within. We have conscious, subconscious and unconscious aspects of our Self, btw, making for lots of relationships in play inside our being in every moment, causing things to play out in our lives externally so we can experience them and be edified by them, therefore growing! (KNOW THYSELF as a phrase of guiding wisdom was at the Temple at Delphi with good reason!)

No doubt you've heard of the typical human conflict of head vs. heart or mind vs. feelings. This is representative of a basic internal relationship between one's own masculine and feminine energies. And it plays out in all our lives in myriad ways, changing over the course of our lives, too.

So all of these ways we feel and think about life practically, theoretically, secretly, existentially and otherwise... are revealed to us in our dreams through use of all of the symbols mentioned above and of course a great deal more.

You may have a different woman appear in dreams for each new feeling, fear, yearning/secret desire, or even each new depth of emotion you discover in yourself, or for those you avoid or deny or repress, or open to or revive from childhood... maybe you get the picture.

Perhaps you and your wife have dinner with a couple you know, and that night you have a dream about the woman from the other couple. It may occur because that woman expressed something at dinner that triggered a familiar feeling in you that you have wanted to understand better. Or she told a story that revealed a fear she's had since childhood and you realized in the telling that you also hold that fear.

I hope these ideas give you a glimpse at how and why different people, of either gender, may appear in your dreams (as well as all manner of other symbols). And that it doesn't mean what it might seem to on the surface.

We are all growing all the time through our life experiences and that growth is added to our greater self/soul, etc. Our dreams are a gift, if we choose to open them, representing the opportunity to make that soul growth conscious, bringing it down to the living level if we want, so we can be conscious participants in our greater life.

A good book for dream symbolism, if you're interested in learning more about what means what in dreams, is Betty Bethards "The Dream Book". This book is Greater Self or Spirit inspired, connecting dream symbols to our life as its known in greater terms, by our larger Beingness.

Hope this helps!! Take or toss as you see fit.

Blessings to you in discovering the life meaning in your dream messages!
Sowelu

[needingsomehelp]

so here are the details from last night.....
i was at a house in the woods.... a pretty nice house. i hopped on to a backhoe and headed down a gravel road. i was on my way to another home that was built in the woods. my intentions were to pick up a pallet of shingles that were left over from building the home. as i went to turn to head towards the house a guy came out of another building in the woods and stopped me. this guy was a combination of two guys that i knew growing up. he was yelling at me telling me that there was plenty of work that needed done and that i was being lazy and disrespectful to him by heading out to pick up the pallet.... my response was that i didn't know anything else needed done. i was frustrated and upset but got down from the backhoe and followed him to the building. he was yelling at me the entire way telling me that i should be helping these guys install the kitchen instead of running around on the backhoe. he then took me up to the building and showed me where the tools where, which were organized and numbered in bins. i grabbed my tools and went into the building and started to work. inside the building were guys that i knew when i was younger all working on installing a kitchen, none of which was done yet. then a lady entered, i didn't recognize her, but apparently she was my wife or girlfriend and the guy who was yelling at me was her dad. she began to argue with him about the way he treated me and that point he started yelling at her and telling her i was just being lazy.... at that point i put my tools down and walked out.... she followed with him screaming at her the entire time.... as we walked out..... i woke up.

[Sowelu]

Originally Posted by needingsomehelp

so here are the details from last night.....
i was at a house in the woods.... a pretty nice house. i hopped on to a backhoe and headed down a gravel road. i was on my way to another home that was built in the woods. my intentions were to pick up a pallet of shingles that were left over from building the home. as i went to turn to head towards the house a guy came out of another building in the woods and stopped me. this guy was a combination of two guys that i knew growing up. he was yelling at me telling me that there was plenty of work that needed done and that i was being lazy and disrespectful to him by heading out to pick up the pallet.... my response was that i didn't know anything else needed done. i was frustrated and upset but got down from the backhoe and followed him to the building. he was yelling at me the entire way telling me that i should be helping these guys install the kitchen instead of running around on the backhoe. he then took me up to the building and showed me where the tools where, which were organized and numbered in bins. i grabbed my tools and went into the building and started to work. inside the building were guys that i knew when i was younger all working on installing a kitchen, none of which was done yet. then a lady entered, i didn't recognize her, but apparently she was my wife or girlfriend and the guy who was yelling at me was her dad. she began to argue with him about the way he treated me and that point he started yelling at her and telling her i was just being lazy.... at that point i put my tools down and walked out.... she followed with him screaming at her the entire time.... as we walked out..... i woke up.

Ahhhh... see? Now we have a context within which to understand these dream relationships.

In this one, it appears you're currently dealing with feelings of self-recrimination/self-loathing (hard-hitting term, I know, but it's the umbrella term for all feelings that cut down the self rather than uplift and love the self).

The era from which most of the people in the dream were known by you is likely the time in which these self-recriminating feelings were locked into place and became a foundation for your self-esteem and self-image, as well as your attitudes and behaviors thereafter. Again remember, this is about you, all of it, and not about anyone or anything else.

In this instance, the woman in the dream is representative of those self-loathing feelings hidden inside. Fear is the root of all feelings that are not love, so bear that in mind as you explore this deep inner feeling self.

Somewhere along the line something occurred in your life that caused you to fear the type of response from others that the father uses against you. When this type of fear is instilled, we develop coping mechanisms or ways of altering ourselves in order to prevent the pain of another rejecting us so vehemently. We also develop a "false self-identity" or a mask over who we really are, also as a means of keeping the peace or attempting to protect ourselves from onslaughts such as you got in this dream.

We often become a "do-gooder", or someone hyper responsible... or the opposite, in the face of this type of circumstance. In the latter case, we can become someone who seems to assume others will always think negatively about us, so we might as well be screw ups. Many will see-saw between these two extreme views of self, btw, and feel like they live on an emotional roller-coaster.

Remember, neither of these views of self are true. They are false self images, based in emotions of fear. This fear is often buried deeply inside, masked over by anger and many thought patterns that serve to prevent you from seeing that root fear... again as protection. (Humans are very complicated energy beings!)

This false self needs to be dismantled in order to become whole and healthy again, and in order to live from the knowing of who you TRULY are, which is a loving and loved child of a benign universe who has never actually done anything wrong and is merely having experiences here on this beautiful planet.

This is the set of feelings that you are "married to" deep inside (the wife you don't know), that create the internal critical parent that lives in your head (males=mental energies), demanding that you see, know and behave in whatever ways you are not in a given moment. In other words, it's the critical mental tape that makes you feel like you're never good enough, fast enough, smart enough, sharp enough, or active enough... always in the wrong place at the wrong time, doing the wrong thing, who "shoulda" known better.

Kitchens in dreams typically refer to a time/space of preparation for nurturing. In the context of this dream, it seems you're being given a heads up that you (your soul, through your human self) will be exploring these feelings now. And that process begins with understanding how they were constructed in you (building the kitchen).

This exploration of deeply held, hidden feelings of fear will play out naturally in your life through events and situations. It's quite helpful to understand what's going on when these events hit the fan, so to say, and this is often why we get a heads up in dreams.

If you look back at your other dreams, those you can remember, look at daily life events around the time of each, and you may well discover that the feelings evoked in the dreams... were then evoked by daily events as well. This is how we explore ourselves in life. The goal is to remain unattached even to our own reactions, realizing that they are "programmed by fear" and not who we really are. They were autopilot programs instilled when we didn't know how else to cope, and needed a way to get through our lives feeling safe. There is nothing wrong with creating a false self, we all do it here, until we become mature enough and courageous enough to go inward and begin to dismantle and heal it.

Hope you find this helpful, take or toss as you see fit. Best to you!!

Blessings to you in discovering the life meaning in your dream messages!
Sowelu

[needingsomehelp]

what you said is very interesting....
last night a few hours before we went to bed we were going through some old stuff that we had..... one of which was a note I left my family when I ran away from home as a teenager to "escape" my homelife......

very interesting..... I'll be sure to post the next time I have a dream with as much context....

thanks again.

[sailrmc]

Hello,
I have just finished this dream evaluation and come back to the beginning to explain what I have done, and how I have approached this evaluation. I have looked at it a line at a time (or a few at a time) to give an idea of the processes of the mind and awareness as to how I came to my conclusion of meaning. I did not read your dream in advance but chose to evaluate it as it progressed or unfolded in your mind. For this reason, things are a bit trite, but it gives an excellent perspective of the dream, which has been wonderfully scripted, cast, and edited just for you (by the subconscious mind). Now that I have fully read Sowelu's response, I would like to say (for whatever it is worth), that it is very impressive, well thought out, wonderfully presented, very eloquent and succinct.
[color="Blue"]While I cannot speak for Sowelu, I see that Sowelu and I seem to be on the same page. As I always say to my friends, When I am on a regatta with a crew of six seasoned regatta crewmen, who know sailing and racing inticately, when a problem arises, there will often be six completely different solutions (each having their own solution).

so here are the details from last night.....
i was at a house in the woods....symbolically, the mind is mapping out the natural flow of thoughts that is to occur in your dream. A setting for the dream saying there is much content that makes up your personal universe of knowledge. This knowledge enables you to be the person that you have become to this point in your life. More simply said, it shows the operation of the mind. It is your mind that selects and assembles the subject matter (that which lives in your universe of knowledge , symbolically in the forest of your mind). a pretty nice house.The house represents you, more specifically how you see yourself. It seems as if you are doing well (a personal evaluation of self). i hopped on to a backhoe and headed down a gravel road.indicating that you are about to "dig into some subject matter, to get to the base, or become grounded regarding a thought that needs some examination)...You see that the dream architecture is announcing the process' of what is happening, the way that the mind finds the information that will be presented in your dream...much like a golf color commentator. An example of this...here we are, at the first hole and it is a beautiful day, and the golfer, Needingsomehelp, is looking in good form.

i was on my way to another home that was built in the woods.Here you are shown the selection process of the mind, announcing that you are about to visit an area of the mind (memories that exist, or emotions that are associated to memories etc) my intentions were to pick up a pallet of shingles that were left over from building the home. as i went to turn to head towards the house a guy came out of another building in the woods and stopped me. this guy was a combination of two guys that i knew growing up. he was yelling at me telling me that there was plenty of work that needed done and that i was being lazy and disrespectful to him by heading out to pick up the pallet.... my response was that i didn't know anything else needed done.I love this! Now your are building an awareness with the subconscious mind. You thought that the house ( You, or the area of your life represented by the house) you were in did not need more shingles (representative of the bits of information that shelter you, and the person that you have become. Meaning that you thought that whatever the house represents, was a completed project (in your mind), something from the past, one that really required no more thought on your part, but you are told differently. One actually uses real life experiences and the feelings and emotions associated to these events, as a foundation, or way that it conducts it's day to day business i was frustrated and upset but got down from the backhoe and followed him to the building. he was yelling at me the entire way telling me that i should be helping these guys install the kitchen instead of running around on the backhoe. he then took me up to the building and showed me where the tools where, which were organized and numbered in bins.This bit of your dream shows the determination of the subconscious mind, to lead you to areas or topics in the available subject matter that it uses construct your very own dreams. Specifically this has to do with your ability to get creative, and grow emotionally, and in practically applied knowledge that you have accumulated as a result of experiencing life. i grabbed my tools and went into the building and started to work.Symbolizing the fact that there is some work to be done, a specific task at hand. The tools represent the way in which the mind enables the awareness that is to come to you as a result of dreaming. Carl Jung named this process of the mind, Individuation". inside the building were guys that i knew when i was younger all working on installing a kitchen, none of which was done yet.Aspects of personalities from the past. The roles these guys play help you to identify the time in your past that contain the emotions and feelings that will be dealt with in this dream. Many times this points to a special time in the past, which you may have for the first time experienced these feelings and emotions.to be examined or applied in the dream. then a lady entered, i didn't recognize her, but apparently she was my wife or girlfriend and the guy who was yelling at me was her dad.In the context shown, this depicts a battle that exists within you. Looking a bit closer at context, it suggests that you you are being a bit hard on yourself (no reason is given but it is apparent that you are aware of this already. Your mind does not really need to explain what this is about because you are already aware of it, if you stop and think about it you will feel this internal struggle. she "she"is an aspect of your make up that represents those traditional characteristics of the female gender that you harbor...the side of your make up that is compassionate, understanding, loving, etc.began to argue with him "him", is the aspect of you physical self, that contains general male traits (aggressiveness, leadership, etc) about the way he treated me and that point he started yelling at her and telling her i was just being lazy....Again, the internal battle is suggesting that you are being a bit rough on yourself, perhaps saying that you are not aggressive, you are being lazy, BUT there is that side of you that suggests that you have earned the right to go along in life at your own pace. at that point i put my tools down and walked out.... she followed with him screaming at her the entire time.... as we walked out..... i woke up.

Consider the whole scenario, and consider that this dream, in addition to the internal battle that has been mentioned thus far, (also simultaneously) is referring to a real life instance. Something has incubated (or triggered) this dream and all the feelings and emotions that go with it. Something from waking life...of recent times.

Ask yourself?
- Have you or anyone else suggested, directly or through innuendo, that perhaps you are not doing the high quality of job that you are capable of ? (this could be in your personal life OR in the job or profession)

- Has this triggered a self inquiry, one that you examine yourself and those efforts that you expend, to achieve excellence? suggested

-Simultaneously this may have brought back memories of a time in which you were being protected by the influence of a female figure in your life?

Now this is your dream, It is written for you and you alone, therefore it is difficult for us to look at one dream and attribute it to a specific instance in your life. I can advise you to overlay it to the goings on in your life By doing this you should be able to pick out the significance and apply the meaning thereof.

In summary:
A couple of notions are seemingly explored, regarding your overall efficiency and use of time and effort to move forward in the path of your life versus, the guilt that you might feel for not expending energy at a rate of your maximum capacity. Someone is protecting you and how you feel about yourself...this would be the compassionate side of self within (protecting you from yourself) , and possibly someone in your waking life who might be saying to those who might be critical of you, to lay off...

Your thoughts???

Regards,
sailrmc
sorry no time to proof.

[needingsomehelp]

thank you for the analysis sailrmc. the things you said make sense.... the concerns that I have (as per my earlier post) is the recurrence of these dreams. I seem to have some sort of dream that involves a relationship (not sex as some suggested) with a female other than my wife almost on a nightly basis. some of the females I know, some I don't. not all of them seem to be in the same context either.... in some of them I know that I am married and have a wife, others, like last night, I seem oblivious. I will post my next one as well.... hoping to gain a better understanding of what's going on....

thanks again for taking the time on my post.