Ex Boyfriend

[acrilley]

Lately I keep having dreams about my ex. He was my first love, first everything pretty much. We dated for about a year and a half our Senior year of high school and into college. We had a terrible break up and though he is at the same college as I am, we never spoke again really. Now I am in a relationship with one of the most amazing guys in the world. He has been a close friend for 5 years and we have a fantastic relationship, never fight, have a great sex life. The only thing is he lives 4 hours away so we only see each other every other weekend.

The Dreams:
The first dream I had involved my ex and I going back to my apartment and starting to have sex. In the dream I completely forgot about my current boyfriend, and when my ex and I start having sex, I suddenly remember and stop him. I explain to him that I'm in love with my boyfriend and he has to go. Then I spent the rest of the dream crying and worrying b/c I had cheated and didn't know if I should tell him and so afraid to lose him.

The second dream my boyfriend and I have a huge fight. I assume that we are broken up and run away and stop talking to him. In the time that he and I aren't speaking, I go to my ex and tell him I want to get back together again. We have sex, and then the next day my boyfriend calls me and says he is sorry and wants to work things out. I said "I thought you broke up with me" and he said "no, no I just needed some time to think about things, I'm not gonna break up with you baby." Then I'm freaked out because I have 2 boyfriends. I want to break up with my ex to be with my current, but I'm afraid that my current will find out and not want me anymore.

I don't understand these dreams and they are really upsetting me, I don't think about my ex or want him. We didn't have the best relationship and my boyfriend and I now do. I feel really guilty for this and I don't know what to do.