Went to Family Event with Another Woman

[DreamDate]

Quick Intro... I am male, married and my wife and I have major problems (she has lots of mental issues, and I want to run, but have stayed around for whatever reason).

Anyhow... I have a weird dream that was more detailed but is becoming common.

Part (A) I go to a family gathering, it seems to involve members of both my family and my wife's family. My wife is there, but I show up with another woman. At first, I seem surprised my wife is there, but at the same time I tend to ignore it because I don't quite understand what is going on. There are not disputes and no one questions this other woman with me.

Note: I had another dream recently where I was with another woman, meeting her somewhere, but these are not sexual dreams, just someone else.

Part (B) This one is kinda weird, I was leaving, not sure if I was with this other woman or with my wife, but as I was leaving and driving out of the driveway, I took a chunk out of my father-in-laws car. He is "well off" and has nice cars, and I really respect the guy, and I felt like such a low life for causing the damage to his car.


I realize this is not a far out dream and it really reflects my thoughts and feelings, but I had to get it out in the open. I long so much to be able to "connect" with someone on a mental level and enjoy being around someone that doesn't suck the life out of me. But, it was odd that my wife was at the house we went too, and family members for both people... everyone seemed cool with me and with this other woman I was with... and no one seemed to notice my wife there, but I knew she was, but she was very quiet.

[bright_dreamer]

Hi,
Maybe your wife's family is fully aware of her problems, and wouldn't be surprised (like in your dream) that you dated another woman.

You feel terrible in your dream about ruining you father in law's car.
You respect him and don't want to do anything that would ruin your relationship.

Maybe your dream represents this conflict..../you may want out of your marriage, but don't want to break ties with her family.

I wish you luck.

[b_randy]

First off, I want to say I am so sorry you're stuck in that situation...in a marriage that seems to take more out of ya than it puts in ya. (I can really relate to that)...Anyways...I think in your dream, obviously you're thinking about what it's like on the outside, so to speak, and that's where the other woman comes in. And with your wife having some issues maybe her family sees the toll that has on you and often wonder to themselves "how does he do it" so maybe they wouldn't be so surprised if you decided enough is enough. As for the fender bender...I think this represents your relationship with your father-in-law. You like him and respect him and how he thinks of you matters to you. You know that if you decided to leave his daughter, it's going to upset him (like u knew in your dream that u hitting his car would) and you feel bad about it and don't want him to think any less of you because in either situation, you really didn't mean to do it.
I hope this helps and I wish you much happiness.
Best of luck,
b_randy

[DreamDate]

Yea, both pretty much nailed it on the head.

My mom has told me that (a) she has no idea how I handle it all and (b) that everyone she talks with, has no freak'n clue how I deal with it all. Especially raise two kids as well in the process.

I think for me, I have mentally "moved on" in our relationship and feel obligated to stay for various personal reasons. My family would be totally cool with it (yet sad for obvious reasons) and I know her family would be hurt by it, but as previous poster said, understanding of it.

So, obviously, the dream was just a reflection of my ongoing struggles and desires.

The odd part about these dreams, is this "other woman" I never talk with, at least to any detail, I have no memory of her face or seems to be nameless. Probably all because I have "mentally" moved on in my life, but who that person is or when, is really not in the picture.

I don't know. Dreams are fun and interesting at the same time.

[smitty1962a]

Hi DreamDate:

I'm in a similar situation myself. There is an organization called NAMI that is a support group for people who have family members with mental health issues. If there is one thing that I've learnewd it is that I have no control what happens to me, but I can control how I react. Take Care. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers.

Smitty