new here: would love your feelings on this...

[jb1980]

before i say any of this, let me just tell you that i remembered this dream VIVIDLY, in much detail, and i dont like to leave anything out... so please bear with the length. i'm gonna have to continue everything in the post below.

also, i posted ADDITIONAL things that have occurred in regard to this person, since the dream. and some of it is just flat out WEIRD... but in a WOW, way. feel me? haha... ok with that said... read on.

i've never been a huge "fan" of heath ledger, but he was someone i admired, for his talent, as well as his avoidance and dislike of the "fame" aspect to his career. i simply adored the man for being so real. i'm also in the same industry, but in a different way, and so i'm around celebs a lot. its nice when i see someone who actually is uncomfortable with the cameras and fame and just wants to ACT and do his craft. its refreshing. but again, no real "ooh ahhh" liking to him, lol. i may have mentioned his name in conversation once or twice a year, if even that, or when a movie was out that he was in.

now... as for say... jake gyllenhaal... haha... HE is my crush

anyway, so the day i heard he died, i was heartbroken. everytime the news came on, i broke down hysterically in tears, and it was so out of character for me... its not like i ever knew him personally, ya know? so this whole thing of me being so upset and distraught... i was totally taken back by my reaction. of all celebrity deaths i've gotten word of... i never reacted like this. an ex boyfriend of mine passed away over a year ago and while i was devastated, i didn't even react like this. i literally felt my heart broken in two. i just could not SHAKE it.

about a week went by and i finally stopped thinking of it, and didn't see any news bits on him the whole time. the dream that i had came on the night of jan 31st, and literally came out of nowhere. like i said, his death had not been on my mind for at least a week before.

the dream...

i think i was at a doctors office or waiting for someone to get off work, and the person behind the counter looked at me and said heath was in the back, so i was like, "oh he's here? tell him i'm here." (i guess we knew each other). so he came out into the waiting area and looks at me and smiles right away. so i walk over and he gives me this big hug as if we were old friends. he was leaning against the front reception desk talking to me, and i jokingly said, "wow, i'm so happy you're here. so what do you do all day?"...and he just smiled. so i said, "heath for real, have you met anyone? haha, do you watch your movies up there? haha, ok i'm kidding....but have you seen whats going on?" and we both cracked up. he looked at me and said, "no i havent met anyone, haha. i dont like to watch myself, i know, its so stupid, but i get all weird about it. and yeah i've seen everything. i just wish these *******s would get off it. i couldn't believe how many people were at my home. i miss my little girl."

as i'm writing this i'm just getting chills because i remember how sincere he looked when we were talking... it was nuts.

about 5 minutes later we were back at my house. i guess we were pretty close friends or something because i just got that comfort feeling with him.

but now he was pulling me onto his lap on the couch and just holding me... holding my hand... rubbing my back... he kept kissing my cheek and the side of my head too. it was actually VERY "sweet".. and the whole thing felt so real that i seriously woke up thinking he was in the room with me. anyway, we went to the kitchen and i asked him to give me 5 minutes cause i wanted to shower real quick and just change. my mom walked over and i gave her this look like i was trying to tell her something but not have him HEAR it... and so i was like, "mom... he just... he will not stop touching me or holding me and he's KISSING ME i dont know what he's doing what the hell is going on", and she just gave me this look back and said... "you should". haha i dont know. so i was in my laundry room getting two towels (i swear everything was SO detailed)... and i grabbed the towels, i was looking for the clothes i was gonna throw on, and i feel him behind me. he wrapped his arms around my waist, turned me around, and just kissed me. I FELT his lips... completely. if someone ever wanted to know what heath ledger's lips felt like-- rest assured, i can tell you. LOL. i remember looking right at him and he was so beautiful... all smiling... and laughing, and he had his long hair back... and for real... he looked like an angel.

it was so damn WEIRD, because in my dream, i KNEW he was dead. because i was JOKING to him about it. and he was laughing and saying how he came to visit me and let me know he was okay, since i've been so upset about it, and everything. he went to kiss me again, and he was really playful in such a sweet manner. and yet, i felt so comfortable with him. i truly felt as if he was someone i had known personally. there was no thought of fame in my dream... he was just heath to me. heath, who acted. and that was that. and who also was dead and just out of nowhere came back to life for a day. who the hell knows lol.

he kissed me once more and i finally said, "what is WITH you tonight??" and he replied, "you have the most amazing lips..." and then i smiled.

in my dream, towards the end before i woke up... someone put on a song. and it was a marc broussard one called "the beauty of who you are", and heath ran from the kitchen and said, "aghh i love this song you have to listen to it!" and i was laughing at him saying i knew the song and i think marc broussard is amazing.

i'll tell you right now, i haven't heard that song in a good 3 months. so i had no reason at all to be dreaming about it.
i dont know... it was just so crazy. i woke up singing the song in my head... and based on past experiences, that only happens when i need to get something from the words. without fail, i always look and they ALWAYS have some sort of relevance in my life for that specific time. EVERY TIME.
but i looked up the lyrics to this one, and i have no clue.

i've never had an affinity or anything to heath ledger. i have NO IDEA where this dream came from. NO idea. i felt his touch. i FELT him hug me as if you and i were hugging like we would never see each other again.

(continued in next post below)

[jb1980]

monday night, i was in the city (nyc) with my friend who was in town from chicago. i live in brooklyn, so pretty much every other night, i'm somewhere in the village or soho, and i wanted to take her to a few spots that i've been meaning to check out. on the way to one of the bars, we turned around the corner to the next street and as we were walking, the strap on my heel came loose, so i stopped and leaned up against a building and tried fixing it. so im tryin to get this thing not to fall off, and my friend let out this *gasp!* and goes, "nanette lepore! i LOVE her clothes!"

i looked up and saw the hanging sign, and i dont know what the hell happened, but i saw a quick flashback of all the news reports on heath's death, and i remember DEFINITELY seeing that sign in every shot. when i snapped out of it and stood up to tell her, some woman was crossing the street and coming towards us with a flower. she got right by us and bent down to put it on the side of where i was standing in the doorway. before i could put two and two together, she goes to my friend, "so sad isnt it? such a shame. why? why him?"...and she was just shaking her head to herself.

so i looked at her, then i looked at my friend, then back at her, and i was like, "wait... who are... you're talking about heath ledger right?" and she gave me this look as if i was a complete moron, and she goes, "who else would i be talking about darlin? this is his apartment, dont you know that?"

the building i was leaning against was HIS. how RIDICULOUS is that, seriously... it wasn't even like where i stopped real quick and i was in some doorway a few numbers down. i was in HIS DOORWAY. i stood there with my mouth open for what felt like 5 minutes. my friend who knew about the dream, she was BUGGIN out. after the woman left, she looked at me and was like, "are you KIDDING me!? you're kidding me right? please tell me this is some joke or something. WHAT THE F**K!?? we could've stopped ANYWHERE! and we end up on his street cause of your damn shoe. AT HIS FRONT DOOR."

i was so shocked i just started freaking out. even though it was his apartment, and the woman put the flower there and said it was his place... i still was trying not to believe her. or more importantly... i was trying not to believe that i just magically ended up at his apt. especially after the weird dream a few nights before. so i almost attacked my friend, lol, i was like, "gimme your phone, GIVE ME YOUR PHONE". i grabbed it from her hand and went searching on google for his death info and news stuff... and everything that came up kept saying 421 broome street in soho. i looked at the door... 421. looked at the phone... looked at the door... looked at the phone... then finally my friend was like, "im sorry... but this would be the biggest coincidence in the history of coincidences if there ever was one... and i just dont for a second believe it. this so was a sign. even just a confirmation from that dream you had. this is NUTS right now."
and seriously... im still like... ahhh what the hell was that. and i totally, without any doubt believe it. i know NOW, that my dream DID have meaning behind it like i thought. and i completely think this was confirmation of it. but what meaning, haha... beats the hell out of me.

tuesday night (the 5th), i had a quick dream of him. he hugged me again, and when he backed up he looked at me and said, "they know today." so i said, "what? who knows what?" and he said again, "they know today", gave me a warm smile, and i woke up. about 2 hours later, all over the news were the results of his toxicology exam on what it was that caused his death.

i sat in my bed like, "NO WAY." he said to me in my dream, THEY KNOW TODAY... and then HELLO, the results are in. they do know. haha, so friggin crazy.

i brought all of this up to my mom, because if it was one thing, ok, i'd laugh and say, cool. but she believes in all the weird stuff, so i figured id throw this at her and see what she thought of everything. she laughed and said, for someone who believes in past lives, im surprised you didnt think of this first. so i was like, what are you talking about? and she said.... well... all this heath ledger stuff, could just be... some cool stuff. simple as that. how you knew the results were in tho, and that he told you that... thats weird. how you ended up at his front door without realizing it... thats weird. so i was like-- alright, but your point? and she said, "when you were a little girl, you were around 3. remember the squirrel that would come to the window at our old house? the one you used to feed?" (LOL i fed a squirrel. way to go mom, thank god he wasnt rabbid or something lol). so anyway, i vaguely remembered and i said yeah why... and she said... "i let you name him. and you said to me, i want to name him sydney. and when i asked you where you got that name from, you said 'where we used to live mommy'." so i was like-- ummm.... wtf? haha. and she continued to say, "then when you were 4 years old, i was cleaning one day and you ran up to me and said, "i have to go to australia. and when i said why do you have to go? you looked at me and said, because my friend is there."

after that weird flashback with mama dukes, she said, "there was no way at the time, that you ever heard of australia or could have known it even existed. when you came up with sydney, i ignored it. but when you said you had to go to australia, i immediately thought about how you could have been remembering a past life there. you even used to walk around speaking with an accent, and there's just no way you could have learned that where we were living, and who you were around."

so thats always something to think about. but either way - the past couple weeks have been crazy over here with me. maybe my moms theory is right (if its not its still funny that i knew of this place when i was like 3)... and regardless... just thought it was an awesome story to put on the forum for you guys. maybe someone has another theory?

[jb1980]

bump... anyone?

[blueberrysummer]

Hey JB

Thank you for sharing your recent experiences I read all of your post and was truly touched by it 'smiles' it sounds like you are discovering something profound within your self and in some way heaths death has opened your heart connection, what links you have with him and to his energy is something personal for you to discover.

Coincidences like yours are happening more and more regularly, its like there is a guided awakening taking place at the moment with in the mind of humanity, you could say an evolving of our relationship to our more spiritual natures with which we connect with through our hearts which incidently is the realm of 'True experience' as opposed to using the intellect which we filter life experiences through.

If you remain in your heart centre and stay with your recent experience and trust in your recent perceptions im sure more answers will be revealed to you as time goes on, one can accentuate answers to be revealed by staying in ones heart centre and with trust ask the questions you most need to know right now! Have you ever read the celestine phrophcy? a wonderful book which highlights how coincidences lead us on a journey of spiritual self discovery. *soo exciting*

Good luck to you Blueberry

[jb1980]

blueberry -

thank you so much for taking the time to read that novel! haha
i've never read the celestine prophesy, but rest assured, i am definitely intrigued and will purchase it very soon. thanks for the heads up!
as for my situation... or experience, rather, you're right. things like this are happening more and more, and WOW it opens your heart and your eyes to SO many things! i'm sure, as you know... that once you notice one thing, the universe decides to send you everything! haha. it kinda gets overwhelming, but im dealing with it. i'm excited though to see what else may come into light